i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I'm just crazy horny about you
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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