to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
The power of my boobs compel you
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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