She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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