Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
