I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
