Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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