your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
