i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
