does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
