I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize