He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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