It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
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