I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize