come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
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