just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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