My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
