she looked like the bat from fern gully.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
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