I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
