We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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