So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I am available for nakedness
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
