A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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