yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize