i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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