Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
