So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
