Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Randomize
