i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
