was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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