I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
