his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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