That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Use "feeling words"
Yay
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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