1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Vodka?
Forever.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
