She said her name was "party"
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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