so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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