5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
