I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Randomize
