ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
40s are totally the cure
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
