cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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