Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
