Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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