Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
