Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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