it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
