If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
