i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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