Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Randomize
