Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
