We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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