thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize