What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
