Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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